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The Plagiarist in the Kitchen

The first and only cookbook by ‘the best amateur chef in the world’ by Jonathan Meades

This book is fully funded, but you can still support it!

  • https://unbound.com/books/the-plagiarist-in-the-kitchen

The Synopsis

Jonathan Meades is the best amateur chef in the world - MARCO PIERRE WHITE

The Plagiarist In The Kitchen is a recipe book which is also a paean to the avoidance of culinary originality (should such a thing exist), to recipe theft, to hijacking techniques and methods, to the notion that in the kitchen there is nothing new and nor can there be anything new. Anyone who claims to have 'invented' a dish is dishonest or delusional or foaming. The very title is lifted, without permission and with the gracelessness that infects Cooking World, from Julian Barnes's The Pedant In The Kitchen (plenty more to rip off there).

Cookbooks feed off cookbooks. Their authors make botched attempts to disguise the sources of their offering. But those familiar with more than half a dozen such books are acquainted with the sensation that I've read that before in - where? The successful plagiarist, as both Michel de Montaigne and T S Eliot noted, covers his tracks.

This book exhibits an absolute candour about the provenance of its content. If I know where a recipe comes from I own up to it. However, I don't copy. I steal. Then I make it my own, which is not to say that I improve it... This might be reckoned as criminally coarse as hacking down an exquisite work of, say, Alfred Gilbert and melting it for scrap. So be it. On the other hand when a recipe has in my opinion improved by tweaking or the exclusion of certain ingredients I shall point this out with the falsest modesty known to man.

The book is, further, a deflected meditation on infections of varying gravity: 'influence', 'inspiration', 'homage', 'channeling' and so on. It proposes that cooking is at best a craft and that craft must always be the same whilst art must always be different - an unoriginal dictum by the way; it is, of course, Gore Vidal's.

What do I get if I pledge?

A cookbook – or perhaps an anti-cookbook – containing 125 recipes, the fruits of a lifetime spent thinking and writing about food.

It will feature strong typography, but no photographs, no step-by-step illustrations, no delicate line drawings, and no faux antique woodcuts.

The Excerpt

Poulet a l'Oignon / Chicken and onions

This comes from my friend Jean-Pierre Xiradakis who serves it at La Tupina in Bordeaux, a restaurant that has been rightly hymned as 'paleolithic'. It is possibly the best restaurant in the world, certainly my favourite...Xiradakis got this dish from the writer and journalist Yves Harté who in turn got it from his mother who...

The recipe he gives in La Cuisine de La Tupina proposes that for four people a chicken should be cut into eight pieces. I prefer to use four legs since they will all cook at the same rate. I also double the quantity of onions that he prescribes (think of soup the next day).

2 kg sweet onions

4 chicken legs

1 glass of chicken stock

1 glass of white wine (optional)

a few scraps of raw ham (optional)

Slice the onions thinly. If your processor has the right kit use it. Whatever you do don't turn them to mush. Do NOT sweat them. Trust me.

Brown the chicken legs in duck fat or olive oil.

Put half the sliced onions in a high sided pan with a lid.

Add the chicken legs ( and ham scraps).

Put in the rest of the onions so that the legs are buried.

Pour in stock (and wine).

Cook at mk 4 for an hour.

As Xiradakis says you will have scented the whole house.

Guinea fowl legs with branch celery is a spin-off worth investigating. Again, slice the celery thinly but don't blanch it. Do brown the legs.

Pasta e Ceci / Pasta and Chickpeas

This one fell off the back of Alastair Little. It also derives from the version served at Mimi alla Ferrovia in Naples. There is a further correspondence, with the Cypriot houmous soup prepared long ago by the Koritsas family at their delightful café opposite Camden Town underground station

500 gr chickpeas

500 gr pasta (rombi or pappardelle)

Olive oil

4 sticks celery

6 cloves garlic

1 hambone

Soak chickpeas overnight. Cook them for a three or more hours with the hambone at a low temperature, just simmering. Sweat celery and garlic. When they're soft add nearly all the cooked chickpeas. Put the lot through the processor. Use chickpea water and oil to get a soupy consistency. Cook the pasta, add to the soup. Decorate with the remaining chickpeas - or don't bother.

Read more...

The Author

Jonathan Meades is the author of Filthy English, Peter Knows What Dick Likes, The Fowler Family Business, Museum Without Walls and Pompey. These last two were funded and published by Unbound, as was his boxette of postcards, Pidgin Snaps. In 2014, he published the first volume of his autobiography, An Encyclopedia of Myself. His many films for the BBC include Abroad in Britain, Meades Eats, Meades on France and, most recently, The Joy of Essex and Bunkers, Brutalism and Bloodymindedness Concrete Poetry. In 2015 he is releasing his first vinyl album, Pedigree Mongrel, a collaboration with Mordant Music featuring specially-recorded readings from his books.

He also knows about food. For 15 years he was the food critic of The Times: he put his mouth where our money was. And he knows the truth about the British gastronomic revolution: he's tried everything once. He knows the human cost of spending three weeks in the Fens or a month in Worcester. He's been served raw bacon on the Isle of Wight and was told he was a fussy eater to have complained. He has eaten at Gannets in Aberystwyth and lived to tell the tale. Despite this gastromatyrdom, he still likes to cook.

The Plagiarist in the Kitchen is his first cookbook.

jonathanmeades.co.uk

'Meades has been compared, favourably, to Rabelais and, flatteringly, to Swift. The truth is that he outstrips both in the gaudiness of his imagination.'
HENRY HITCHINGS, TLS

'Whatever he is doing and however he is doing it, he will make you think.’
LUCY MANGAN, Guardian

‘A human Enigma machine...Jonathan Meades is the Jonathan Meades of our generation.’
AA GILL

Sceptical, forthright, unbiddable and seriously droll.'
ANTHONY QUINN, Metro

Meades is brainy, scabrous, mischievous and a bugger to pigeonhole: a fizzing anomaly in today's landscape of banality-spouting identikit presenters.'
TIM TEEMAN, The Times

The scope of his ideas, the force of his arguments, the sheer vitality of his sentences: these things come at you like negative ions after a storm, with the result that you soon start to feel an awful lot better –envious but revitalised, too.'
RACHEL COOKE, New Statesman

Q&A

David Camier-Wright

Hi Jonathan
Is it your intention to be present at the lunch of your own devising and manufacture? It's not that I would like your company, heaven forbid, but it would be reassuring to have you in front of us as poison taster in chief.
Many thanks... David

Unbound
Unbound replies:

Hi David,

Thanks for getting in touch. Jonathan will indeed be present at the lunch, both as head chef and poison taster in chief. He might even tell a few stories, you never know.

If there is anything else I can help you with please don't hesitate to get in touch via Unbound.co.uk/support.

Best wishes,

Caitlin - Community Coordinator

Neil Stanley
Neil Stanley asked:

Hi Jonathan

What happens if I pledges for the 'Meades blowout' but once the date of it is fixed I find that I am unable to make that date?

Many Thanks

Neil

Unbound
Unbound replies:

Hi Neil,

Thanks for getting in touch. We try to make sure that the lunch is on a day that suits the most guests and aim to give at least 6 weeks notice before the event. If you can't make it you are welcome to offer your place to a loved one or you can contact us via unbound.co.uk/support to discuss a partial refund. If there is anything else we can help with please don't hesitate to get in touch via unbound.co.uk/support.

Best wishes,

Caitlin - Community Coordinator

James Millar
James Millar asked:

Hi Caitlin

Whilst Nick Hornby may harbour no desire to dine with Mr Meades, I positively would. Therefore, should any spaces at the "Meades blowout" become available I would happily step in.

Kind regards

JM

Unbound
Unbound replies:

Hi James,

Thanks for getting in touch. Of course, if any more spaces become available you'll be the first to know.

Best wishes,

Caitlin - Community & Events Manager

Yin li
Yin li asked:

Hello - please could you confirm when the hardback books will be shipped to backers please? Thank you.

Unbound
Unbound replies:

Hi Yin,

Thanks for getting in touch. We're aiming for a publication date in late Autumn 2016.

Best wishes,

Unbound Support

Flick Hudson
Flick Hudson asked:

Any news on when this book is to be published? I'm awfully hungry...

Kind Regards
Flick Hudson

Unbound
Unbound replies:

Hi Flick,

Thanks for getting in touch. We're aiming for a publication date in late Autumn 2016.

Best wishes,

Unbound Support

The Rewards

All supporters get their name printed in every edition of the book. All levels include immediate access to the author's shed.

$15
Digital
E-book edition, access to the shed and your name in the back of the book
📖 Pledge $15 58 pledges
$30
Hardback
1st edition hardback, e-book edition, access to the shed and your name in the back of the book
📖 Pledge $30 431 pledges
$65
Collectable
Signed 1st edition hardback, e-book edition, access to the shed and your name in the back of the book
📖 Pledge $65 64 pledges
$55
Cook with a friend
2 copies of the 1st edition hardback, e-book edition, access to the shed and two names in the back of the book
📖 Pledge $55 8 pledges
$130
Recipe Cards
Signed 1st edition hardback, e-book edition, access to Jonathan’s shed and your name in the back of the book plus a set of 6 exclusive Meades recipe cards (10 of each) to spice up your written communication
Sold out
$325
Meades Blowout
Everything up to recipe cards plus a ticket to a lunch at central London restaurant with a menu devised and cooked by Jonathan himself
Sold out