Can you get me to 20% for the weekend?

Friday, 2 August 2019

I'm on 19%. I probably only need one or two more to get there. It will make my day and when I'm happy I make voodoo dolls of Boris Johnson. They've sold out. So come on, pleeeeeease. If you've already supported, could you kindly bully a friend? Thanks, ever so.

4%? Fuck. Why didn't I just do a fun run?

Tuesday, 2 July 2019

If I have ever made your life more bearable in any way, please will you pledge for my first book.

I will NEVER ask you for money for a fun run because I don't run or have fun. The two together would be catastrophic.

So this is your chance.

Please pledge today. It will make me happy momentarily. Yes, my ego is that hungry.

HUGE THANKS TO THOSE WHO ALREADY HAVE - you clearly love me the…

20% funded
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