The app on release with a credit as a co-producer.
$20
25 pledges
The Missing Diary
The app on release, the missing pages of the diary and credited as a co-producer.
$40
10 pledges
Beta Tester
Be a beta-tester for the app before anyone else gets to see it, the missing pages of diaries and credit as an Executive co-Producer (with a star by your name and everything).
$75+ shipping
6 pledges
Print
Signed print of an original Pete Fowler art work.
$125
4 pledges
Launch Party
Invite to the suitably herpetological launch party for 2 people, plus everything included in the Missing Diary level.
$250+ shipping
Print Bundle
A limited edition set of four signed Pete Fowler prints plus everything at the Missing Diary level.
Numbers limited
$625
Lizardification
Your face as a lizard inside the app.
Only 3 available!
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More than ever, the world might seem chaotic and ruddlerless, but Ziggy Roswell said that we’re all under the command and control of a cabal of shape-shifting intergalactic lizards…
You are Zelia Wilson, a singer, whip smart, filthy rich with nothing to prove. Which is handy, except your best mate Dave has just been killed.
Now, once upon a time Zelia and Dave were The Eschatones, the world's biggest band, until Dave quit, changed his name to Ziggy Roswell, and retreated to his mansion in the country, like a proper rock star. That was twenty three years ago.
But now Dave is back, and he says he's written a new album for The Eschatones and he wants Zelia to play it with him at a Glastonbury comeback slot. Which Zelia is into. Except that Dave Mansion, or Ziggy Roswell, or whatever he calls himself these days, has called the album Reptile Resistance and has started obsessing about lizards.
Because Dave says that earth is run by a cabal of shape-shifting intergalactic lizards.
And Dave says that the moon is a hollow, reality-controlling super computer. And that the lizards use wifi to enslave the human mind.
Dave says that in their fake human form, lizards run the EU, NATO, the NSA, The Vatican, China, Russia. They control every war, every uprising, all the intelligence, all the counter intelligence. They walk by us in the street, drink in our bars, work in our offices. They milk us of wealth and freedom.
Now Zelia thinks that's cobblers, but she likes a laugh and agrees. But then – bang… Dave is killed live on stage right in from of her at Glastonbury. It couldn't be the lizards could it?
With his last breath, Dave tells Zelia that she has to go to his mansion and find five notebooks, and that these notebooks will reveal the truth about the controlling reptoid power elite.
Zelia promises. She has to. Dave is dying. So come with Zelia as she searches Dave's mad rock star mansion, with its orangery, its turrets, and its priestholes. Hunt for Dave's notebooks. Crack the notebooks' code, find out who’s really pulling the strings.
Available on ioS and Android for your tablet and phone.
Pete Fowler (@themonsterist) is an artist, designer, DJ and musician who has created album covers for Super Furry Animals and artwork for bands including The Horrors and Tim Burgess. His illustrations adorn book covers, t-shirts, skateboards, comics and prints. He is one half of the band, Seahawks. He spent several years creating monsters.
Saffron plays Zelia Wilson. Saffron is a singer/songwriter/actress, who formed and fronts the techno-indie band Republica, whose new album is out soon.She's had number 1 hits in multiple countries with 'Ready To Go' and 'Drop Dead Gorgeous' and worked with The Prodigy, The Cure, Carl Cox, N-Joi and Junkie XL. She’s big into Wing Chun Kung Fu. Twitter: @SaffRepublica
Tom Battey is a narrative designer whose work spans prose, interactive fiction and game design. He aims to create new ways to tell stories, whether that’s through text, hypertext, or immersive digital worlds. Previous projects include speculative fiction novels, immersive narrative projects both physical and digital, and videogame design. He is very probably not a lizard. Twitter: @tombattey
C M Taylor is author of the cult Kev King novels (Premiership Psycho and Group of Death) which he is currently adapting for TV. He is a ghost-writer, screenwriter, editor of fiction and an Associate Lecturer at the Oxford International Centre for Publishing Studies. Nobody told him it would be this hard. @CMTaylorStory
John Crump is banned from Twitter
I had hundreds of bona fide humans on the payroll.
My fortune was covering the meth benders of unhinged hackers in Palo Alto, boosting the pension schemes of monomaniac physicists remixing molecules in secret garage labs. I even had a couple of Whitehall mandarins slipping me info on the sly. But the jewel in my crown of subterfuge and reptile resistance was Kim Basu. That slime had been The Chief of Staff of the US Air Force, and he'd seen enough to know the lizards were real.
He got me a document he'd managed to get his hands on. Encrypted of course. But I got some lass with quick fingers and enough terrahertz in her bedroom to bust it open.
What I found was off the scale.
Because the lizards were using weather as a weapon.
As reported to you back in July, the full game is complete and we are delighted with it.
That has been the case for over 6 months now, and we have been patiently waiting on the publisher to engage on both the fulfilment of your financial pledges, and their contractual publishing of the game.
I mention this because we had a feisty pledger quite rightly come at us wanting to know…
7th July 2022Reptiles Resisted
So finally, the text and the art and the game engine and the music and the soundeffects and the voice-over are all assembled, the beta testing has been done, and the narrative game is finished and ready to launch.
Here is the credit page.
I'm sure there will be news in the near future from the publisher about getting hold of your copy, and about the publication, etc, but for now I just…
10th August 2021Fnord
Uncharacteristic activity ripples through our reptilian project.
Crump is toiling demented down the conspiracy mines, quarrying nuggets of pure QAnon to smelt into our theorems. (He's updating the pages in the game which form the private notebooks of our deranged rock lord, Dave Mansion)
Tom has almost finished hanging all Pete's art off the game engine and is now working on a surprise for those…
11th May 2021Have You Remained Vigilant?
It has been a while. Some whiles, even.
Many of you will have forgotten that you even signed up for this cockamamie project. Others will have been silently resenting our lack of delivery, whilst growing ulcers.
Sorry about the ulcers. They will pop eventually, flooding your intestines with toxins.
The truth (or rather a lie I am currently typing) is it that we have been kidnapped (again)…
3rd August 2017Development Introduction by Tom
Hello lizard friends.
Just a quick update to introduce myself and give a brief look into the work I’m doing on Reptile Resistance. I’m Tom, I’m a narrative games designer, and I’m doing the development work on the project; essentially taking Craig, Mark and Pete’s work and mashing it all together to turn it into something you can play on a mobile device.
As a narrative designer I’m used to messing…
6th March 2015CCTV, analysed.
On average us plebs in the UK are filmed by CCTV 70 times per day. We are the most watched society in history, and with just 1% of the world’s population we have one fifth of the world’s cameras. According to Tony Porter, the UK’s Surveillance Camera Commissioner, a local authority in the midlands got rid of a quarter of a million ‘useless and ineffective’ cameras last year, but there are still six…
5th March 2015Nine Weeks To Go
Nine weeks to go until the election and it has been pointed out that I'm obsessing about Farage. Quite why it's an issue to be concerned about a populist right-wing demagogue in the run up to an election is beyond me, but nonetheless I have taken these comments to heart and this week will not write a word about him. Instead, this:
Ok?
Thanks.
Craig
PS: Art is the handiwork of…
26th February 2015The Horror, The Horror
Ten weeks today until the general election and we are continuing the theme of sticking the boot into Farage by making-up weird people and then pretending to interview them. This week, cult Dutch horror director Wanda van-Hasselhoff explains why Nigel, and Ukip politicians in general, have a second career just waiting for them should their political lives not work out:
'For sure I would sign Nigel…
16th February 2015The lack of opposition, and how it reflects on all of us.
I think most sane people realise that this government is composed entirely of lizard scum - and as such would like to see every one of the current cabinet die in a fire – so naturally you’d expect there to be a huge swell of positive opinion for whoever was likely to come along and oust them.
But just look at Labour. Every one of their front bench are mindwarped… Do they even know who they are…
13th February 2015The Special Underwater Train
Twelve weeks to go before the election and we're dropping all pretense of following the news. Instead here's a vituperative hatchet job on Farage's attitude to the EU, including long quotes from the ghost of a fictional English soldier.
For Nigel the channel tunnel may be the devil's umbilical cord, exposing once-impregnable Blighty to foreign licentiousness, a chink in Albion's armour allowing…
5th February 2015Two-Facedbook
Thirteen weeks until the UK's general election and it's been pointed out that our weekly election blogs have started to concentrate too much on things like politics at the expense of leaving room for jokes about massive devious lizard from the constellation Draco.
It's clear why that is. The moon has been moving conspicuously closer to earth over the last few weeks, meaning its reality-controlling…
30th January 2015Weaponise That by C M Taylor
Fourteen weeks until May's general election and the brouhaha at Prime Minister's question time in the House of Commons Wednesday revolved around Cameron pressing opposition leader Ed Miliband to confirm or deny if he had said he intended to 'weaponise the NHS' during the election campaign.
But Miliband obfuscated and squirmed and neither confirmed nor denied he had used the W word. Quite why the…
23rd January 2015Chilcot... and what it reveals about who's still running the show.
If we weren’t all so desensitised to a political class working together this kind of thing would make us all revolt. But we are so it will probably just make you shrug.
At the same time as it was announced that the result of the 6 year long enquiry into the Iraq war, the Chilcot Report, still won’t be published before the election, it was also revealed that 5 years negotiation between those about…
23rd January 2015Blowing Smoke by C M Taylor
Fifteen weeks until the election and in what might be one of the last covert moves before the parties stop pretending they're not campaigning, Cameron got stuck into opponents with a sneaky piece of innocent-faced chicanery, aimed at both putting clear water between himself and Ukip, and zapping Labour on an increasingly important issue.
Health Minister Jane Ellison announced Wednesday night that…
15th January 2015The Purple Revolution by C M Taylor
My pick of the election news this week is the announcement that Nigel Farage - the leader of the campaign to bring back the 1970s - has signed a deal to publish a book entitled The Purple Revolution: They Year That Changed Everything. The book, Farage's entirely justified second memoir, after 2011's Flying Free, will handily be released just before the UK's May general election, and take us, '...behind…
15th January 2015The Election TV debate row.
This week's big election news came when D-Cam pretended that he wasn't prepared to get involved in a series of live TV debates unless the Greens are asked along to annoy Labour, in the same way that UKIP are going to annoy him.
His concern is that Farage is going to make the the tories seem relatively sane, and this isn't going to appeal to the masses who've become trapped in a Stockholm Syndrome…
15th January 2015Reptile Resistance Election Campaign
Hello,
Yes we have been quiet. And there is a reason. We were hibernating over the festive period, restoring our lizard hunting powers to be ready for the coming challenge. By which of course I mean the general election. May 7th unless things change. 16 weeks away.
We are going to be running our own general election campaign to get Reptile Resistance funded. Crump and I will be writing a blog…
19th December 2014Questions Vital to Humanity
Hello,
You may have noticed we've gone a bit quiet. Well, we were marooned in a quantum dungeon beneath Goldman Sachs for a while, but we got out. Most of us anyway. Also, it's Xmas which is not a lizard hunter's super besso time of year. So we'll be back with full anti-reptile force in The One Five. Yes, I did just call 2015 that.
But in the meantime, as the year comes to an end, important…
7th December 2014Merry Christmas from Earth's Minister of War.
7th December 2014Remain Vigilant
News just in that the disguises of our lizard enemies are becoming more sophisticated.
Also, me Mum and Dad have just pledged on here, so stop dicking about and let's pretend this is important work we're doing.
Good luck for the week.
Craig
x
These people are helping to fund Reptile Resistance.
not a question - just comment. There was an excellent B movie made decades ago with wrestler Rowdy Roddy Piper in the lead role, playing a guy who can see the lizard people - so very like your lizard people - same basic idea - and discovers a barrel of special glasses that will allow anyone to see them. He sets out to convince others and find a way to overcome the evil lizards who are ruining life on Earth. I always thought it would have made a better TV show than B movie, but it was worth watching.
C M Taylor replied:
Yep. Loved that film. john Carpenter's They Live. The fight scene in the alley one of the greatest of all time. That film is merely one of the trash culture references we have stolen. Apologies for taking so long to reply. We were kidnapped by the mothership. Thans. Craig.
Stella Wisdom asked:
Has this app been released, or when is the expected release date?
I couldn't see any information about this in the shed section.
C M Taylor replied:
Hi Stella,
We are in the build stage at the moment, so no release as yet.
The script is written and Tom Battey is working hard on a full first build which will be done in the next few days, ready for more art work and sound to be added.
We are hoping to have it out by the end of the year. But more realistically it may be early next.
Thanks so much for asking.
Craig
not a question - just comment. There was an excellent B movie made decades ago with wrestler Rowdy Roddy Piper in the lead role, playing a guy who can see the lizard people - so very like your lizard people - same basic idea - and discovers a barrel of special glasses that will allow anyone to see them. He sets out to convince others and find a way to overcome the evil lizards who are ruining life on Earth. I always thought it would have made a better TV show than B movie, but it was worth watching.
Yep. Loved that film. john Carpenter's They Live. The fight scene in the alley one of the greatest of all time. That film is merely one of the trash culture references we have stolen. Apologies for taking so long to reply. We were kidnapped by the mothership. Thans. Craig.
Has this app been released, or when is the expected release date? I couldn't see any information about this in the shed section.
Hi Stella, We are in the build stage at the moment, so no release as yet. The script is written and Tom Battey is working hard on a full first build which will be done in the next few days, ready for more art work and sound to be added. We are hoping to have it out by the end of the year. But more realistically it may be early next. Thanks so much for asking. Craig