Pineapples In The Pool

By Melissa J. Davies

A debut poetry collection that asks the age old question: if you throw a pineapple in a pool - would it sink or float?

Poetry
110% funded
95 supporters
Published

Publication date: September 2018

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Pineapple Chunk

A copy of the ebook
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$20  + shipping
15 pledges

Ripe Pineapple

An early bird discount on a copy of the paperback, plus your name in the acknowledgements in the front of the book.

15 available.

$30  + shipping
43 pledges

Crushed Pineapple

A copy of the paperback, plus your name in the acknowledgements in the front of the book.
$50  + shipping
9 pledges

Sinking Pineapple

Do pineapples sink or float? This is your chance to vote. Choose this option to say that they sink. Plus a copy of the paperback, a super fancy bookmark and your name and vote in the acknowledgements in the back of the book.
$50  + shipping
16 pledges

Floating Pineapple

Do pineapples sink or float? This is your chance to vote. Choose this option to say that they float. Plus a copy of the paperback, a super fancy bookmark and your name and vote in the acknowledgements in the back of the book.
$100  + shipping
9 pledges

Pineapple Salsa

Three copies of the paperback, an A3 poster of the cover design signed by me, a super fancy bookmark and your name in the acknowledgements in the back of the book.
$195  + shipping
5 pledges

Pineapple Tart

A copy of the paperback, a handwritten poem of your choice, an A3 poster of the cover design signed by me, a super fancy bookmark and your name in the acknowledgements in front of the book.

5 available.

$325  + shipping
1 pledge

Pineapple Jam

A personal dedication from the author in the front and the ebook edition.

Only one available.

$645  + shipping
1 pledge

Pina Colada

Three copies of the paperback, a personally written poem that is written for you on a theme of your choice (this is very relevant if you are Dev Patel), an A3 poster of the cover design signed by me, a super fancy bookmark and your name in the acknowledgements in the front of the book. Also my undying love and appreciation which I think you’ll agree is priceless.

Only one available.

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Pineapples in the Pool is a collection of poems about falling in love and having your heart broken; they’re about moving around and feeling a little bit lost; growing older and having no idea what life is about but having a go anyway.

They’re also about how handsome Dev Patel is and how great it is to eat crisps in your underwear and old lady vaginas. So a mixed bag really.

If you like your poetry lighthearted and hopeful with a splattering of celebrity adoration then Pineapples in the Pool is for you. The author’s own mother once described the poems as “actually quite good”, and with praise as good as that, how can you resist?

Buy

Quick select rewards

$15 
20 pledges

Pineapple Chunk

A copy of the ebook
Choose this reward
$30  + shipping
43 pledges

Crushed Pineapple

A copy of the paperback, plus your name in the acknowledgements in the front of the book.
  • Melissa Davies avatar

    Melissa Davies

    Melissa Davies is a writer and poet originally from London. She began writing poetry at school and had her first poem published in an anthology when she was 14 years old. The anthology was a Christian publication which was supposed to show people’s relationship with God but Melissa’s poem was about a boy she fancied at school (and she isn’t even slightly religious. Being a teenager is a confusing time).

    Since then, luckily, she has become much better at submitting things that are relevant and her work has appeared in publications across the UK, Australia and the US.

    After living in Perth, Western Australia for eleven years Melissa has now returned to the UK, where she lives in a tiny flat by the beach where she spends most of her time watching seagulls battle against the wind.

    Twitter: @msmeldee

    Facebook: @daviesmelissaj

    www.melissajdavies.com

  • My Geriatric Vagina

    I'm thirty four and a third
    and I am told,
    that if I want to have a child
    I have to do so soon because
    after thirty five
    pregnancy is not a normal pregnancy
    but a geriatric pregnancy
    I expect that in eight months
    my vagina will shrivel
    and become an old lady
    separated from the rest of my body
    by a slice of grey
    it will start to knit
    and bake scones
    it will call younger people
    dearie
    and offer unsolicited life advice
    and start shouting at cheese 

    my vagina will need its own
    distress button
    in case it has a fall
    because it's been moved into a
    care facility and forgotten about
    because who cares about old people
    let alone a geriatric vagina 

     

    rotting comfort

    we lie together
    him and me
    in a bed made of
    rotting comfort 

    the pillows
    are bundles of
    twigs and leaves
    that drag my hair 

    the quilt is
    piles of moss
    knitted together
    with desperate pleasure 

    with desperate pleasure
    knitted together
    piles of moss
    the quilt 

    drags my hair
    twigs and leaves
    are bundles of
    pillows 

    in rotting comfort
    our bed is made
    we lie together
    him and me 

    Read more...
  • Melissa J. Davies has written 4 private updates. You can pledge to get access to them all.

    19th July 2018 The thing with publishing...

    ... is that it takes time. 

    So much time. 

    There are countless people inolved behind the scenes - each with their own workload, availablity, deadlines. Which means there are long periods of time where it feels as though nothing is happening. But things are happening. Although it seems slow and although I am impatient, my book is slowly coming to life. The cover design is done and will soon be…

    15th May 2017 What a week - Pineapples in the Pool is 26% funded!

    Bloody hell it's been a bit of a whirlwind this.

    Really it's just about wanting to say an absolutely enormous THANK YOU! to everyone that has pledged so far, I'm almost over the stage where I burst into simultanious tears and laughter every time I check my page. So thank you thank you THANK YOU, you completely wonderful people. 

    (I promise my next update will have more substance and less gushing…

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