My Tutu Went AWOL!

By Iestyn Edwards

When you audition by accident and take your cross-dressing ballerina act to entertain the troops in Iraq & Afghanistan

Monday, 26 June 2017

Tabard Tweaks

  Afternoon to you all - and apologies for a lack of posts.  I've been recording the audiobook of ​Tutu with Mornington Media - including songs - and writing the next book, ​Found, Found My Tutu Now ​(working title) having been signed to agent Lisa Eveleigh at Richard Beckford Associates.  'We need to know more about your psychic mother, country and western singer father, the strip-a-gram giraffe...' 

  All this being Unbound's and your doing.  Hoorah.

  I think...

  Thrilled that ​Tutu ​is being carried around on concessions trays (I am an ex-Royal Opera House usherette after all) at the Winter Gardens Margate, the Hippodrome Leicester Square and the Royal Albert Hall. And I love seeing it in my local shop. Thank you. ​Local Author with Rave Reviews in Non-Local Press

  Cynthia has retired from the shop. Let me tell you about Cynthia...

  First time ever shopping at Cynthia’s I had looked for a basket, not found one, begun taking items off the shelves.  Excusing herself from a customer, Cynthia had politely but firmly relieved me of the items, and indicated with a slow nod that I should wait my turn. ‘We’re not self-service here like the supermarket.  Oh, and Wood’s garage is only self-service at the moment because of the bereavement.’

  Then when it was my turn, she had asked me what I would like.  ‘Jam, first, would it be?  Thank you very much.’  Tweaking the fringe of her page-boy bob, then the middle button on her tabard and lastly the knees of her stockings.  ‘And would that be apricot, blackberry, blackcurrant, damson, gooseberry, quince, raspberry or strawberry?’  

  Damson, please. 

  ‘Thank you very much.  And would that be Robinsons, Tiptree or home made?  Home made, would it?  Thank you very much.’  The three tweaks again.  ‘And would that be home made by Mrs Aaron, Mrs. Abbot, Mrs. Ackhurst, Mrs. Addenham, Mr…hm!...Agate, Mrs. Ahern, Mrs. Allan, Mrs…’

  I decided against buying Pic-N-Mix.

  But please decide to review Tutu ​on Amazon!  I'm off to showcase my book show talk at the Women's Institute tomorrow...



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