Wednesday, 12 July 2017
Sprinting ahead while dragging my feet
What a strange post title that is, dear supporters. Has she gone mad? You ask. Lost her use of language? (or the use of her legs?) She's mixing ideas and images that conflict. Does she actually know what she's doing anymore? Should we go away and pretend we didn't read this? Poor girl.
Hello supporters, ahem,
My alter ego wanted to take over this post but we've decided to share it. You see, being in the Unbound world for so long and making it to the funding point - thanks again - and then piece by piece letting go of the manuscript to various editors has been a long process. Being asked to re-consider word choices, dialogue, even at times the character's histories and timelines has stirred up my own thoughts about them and their connections. Re-reading the 130 pages makes me question each one:
What do I really want to say with LOVE BITES?
Are there overlaps in theme?
Do the worlds come to life?
Will readers care?
I begin to question myself too, and the editors, and the writing itself.
Today is the deadline for the copy edited manuscript - its last stage of being checked. Today I found an extra 'and' in the text - big wow, I know, but it made me realize that nothing is perfect, most of all: me. The book is as it is, and I am as I am doing the best I can do. Although I should be finishing the last check for the editors, I'm writing this instead because the process is going so quickly now, like a sprint, and I am holding back on letting go of my manuscript. Letting go means saying goodbye. Once those words are out there, there's no taking them back. Once you get your copy the words will be for you to read, to hold in your hands, to enter your minds, the characters will be people you meet on the page and, hopefully, care about.
I'll be so happy to share these stories with you, if I can only let go of them.