Love Bites

By Elena Kaufman

Foreigners, drifters, and eccentrics reach out to strangers in their desire to be witnessed, to be connected, and to find safety in a sea of anonymity

Tuesday, 17 July 2018

Dear life, dear Leon, dear Love Bites, dear Leute,

Dear life,

Would you mind moving over to the slower lane? You’re simply going too fast this year.
I’d like to catch up, or even keep up, but am struggling to reach my pit stops on time. And I really do have to pee, like every 5 minutes (too much information?) Who knew the amount of energy it’d take to keep 1.5 year old twins and the dog out of the kitchen, get supper on the table, change diapers, sing songs, read stories, play with Lego, and then try to be a grown-up for 5 minutes in the evenings? I’m not complaining mind you, although I’m sorry teeth, that I haven’t flossed lately and now the dentist is mad at me. Oh, and there’s the outstanding emails to my aunt and those party photos to upload to my family. And all of those starred emails in my inbox pulsing with expectation. And what about reading? Isn’t that part of a writer’s job too? Well, the pile of books on my bedside table is getting so tall it's threatening to topple on my head while I sleep.

This is beginning to sound normal to most of you, right? Or are you more reasonable with your time and is life evenly-paced for you? If yes, please reveal your secret. If no, and you feel like I do then I challenge you to try this – write down everything you do in a day, even the little things, then calculate how many hours you’re awake to do them and then be amazed.

But still, unfortunately, some things still fall to the wayside. And here is just one of them…

Dear Leon,

My partner in crime, you’ve been with me on this book journey, napping at my feet, barking to wake me up when I fall asleep at my desk, taking me for walks which gets the blood pumping and thoughts flowing. You were in my initial video (made by Nettie and Nick – thank you!) which helped fund this book, showing off your fluffy, shaggy-dog self. And look what you get in return…today you were shorn like a sheep. Now you’re having an existential crisis because we went away to North America for 2 months and didn’t organize a groomer so your fur got so matted and tangled that your skin couldn’t breath and we had no other option but to shear you. All of that beautiful shag gone. Poor boy, I am so sorry and promise you double your daily treats, just as much cuddling as before, and a new coat if you get cold. You’re still my best buddy. And on that note…

Dear Love Bites,

I’m sorry I left you floating in the ethers, that I haven’t done massive marketing for you, like some Unbounders, that I haven’t even launched you (by breaking a bottle of champagne over your head, reading you out to the public and signing you). You are out there as an e-book, and now as a paperback and I know you are being read and appreciated quietly but not so much publicly. On Goodreads you have 22 ratings of nearly 5 stars, and 15 reviews; on Amazon you have only a few reviews but they’re 5 star. Some people get your stories, some people have expressed how they feel reading you. Some have not read you, are waiting for the paperback, or have put you on their pile of books to read. I’m sorry about that, dear book. I will try better. And on that note…

Dear Leute (people),

Please accept my thanks again for your support. Your pledge reserved you the free eBook which you should have gotten a link to in an Unbound email. Just search for: Love Bites and Unbound in your emails and you should find out how to download the book for your Kindle or other device. You should also get it by logging into your Unbound account and finding the button beside my book that says ‘download’. If you have problems let me know.

If you’re one of those who prefer having a paper book in your hand then you can purchase it on Amazon by going to your country’s store.

The e-book is 99 Euro cents/99 GBP/1.16 USD/1.99 CAD
The paperback is 8.23 Euros/9.99 GBP/14.45 USD/10.58 CAD

Once you do read it, please take a moment to rate and/or review it. I know you’re all busy with your own personal to-do lists and when one thing is ticked off there are two others to come. But you did take the time to show interest in the book in the first place and reading it should be your reward.

I’ll tell you what, if I promise to go and floss right away will you take the same amount of time to rate (star it) or review it (write your response)? Us writers sell more books because of reviews and Amazon has captured the market on that so  reviews equal visibility which equals sales. If you do take that moment (and floss after) please know you’ll make me, Leon, my book, Goodreads, Amazon, and yourself happy. And I’ll give you a big hug (virtual or real) and a personal thank you. That’ll go on the top of my to-do list, even if I have to change to the really slow life-lane to accomplish it.  

with love, and appreciation,
AMAZON: (this will take you to the Amazon site in your country)

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