Kitten on a Fatberg

By Dan Brotzel, Martin Jenkins, Alex Woolf

A farcical novel-in-emails about an eccentric writers group. They've all got a book in them, unfortunately.

Sunday, 2 June 2019

Life Begins at Forty (a poem by Blue)

Life Begins at Forty
 
by Blue 
 
They say that life begins at forty - don't make me laugh!
As the dread day approaches I feel like a giraffe
With laryngitis.
My creative juices will dry up and agglutinate
And people will say that it's age inappropriate
To have a full back tattoo of Robert Smith.
They say that life begins at forty, you'll feel free!
But that is not how it feels to me.
It feels like standing at the top of a ski jump
The only way is down and you end with a bump*.
So, it's over the edge
On the skis of remorseless time,
Hurtling down the slope, burdened with
The vacuum cleaner my mother got me
For my 15th birthday, instead of the
Alien Sex Fiends album I had clearly
Said I wanted.
People say I should let it go but
I would then be lighter and go faster!
They say that life begins at forty - don't make me laugh!
*i.e. death

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