Fifty Per Cent – a poetic tribute from Blue

Monday, 9 September 2019

Fifty Per Cent


That could mean a glass

Half full or

Half empty.

My favourite glass -

A memento from a

Goth Weekender in Whitby

Showing a view

Of the Abbey -



Smashed to a million pieces by

A careless cat.

The Whitby trip was nice:

I met Greg, looking good

In vampire drag, his eyeliner



When we met up later in London

It became clear he was

A part-time…

Can it be true? We've hit 50%!!!!

Monday, 2 September 2019

I cannot believe we are now on 50%. In other words, if my maths is correct, we are halfway there! The authors have informed me that my previous update to mark the occasion of 40% was a little ‘self-regarding’. They said I should show more ‘gratitude and humility’ this time. So with that in mind I would like to humbly and gratefully thank all the contributors who have pledged so far. Thank you each…

We have 130 backers!!!

Friday, 5 July 2019

Wow! Extraordinary! Our humble project now has 130 backers. That’s more than the number of words I’ve written in the past week! Thanks to every single one of you for your wonderful support. I can feel your collective love flowing through me, giving me strength! You believe in me, so maybe I can start to believe in myself, too!

Alice Knowles


I've just heard: 130 generous people have put…

Congratulations! (what's my percentage?)

Monday, 3 June 2019

So now we’re on 40%. Who’d have thunk it! As the Arhythmic Tics of Planet Pi (Vol VI, Chapter 13) might cry, ¡thätzâlmøstfiftēę!

I’m proud to have played my part in getting us to this almost not quite halfway stage in our journey, even though I don’t totally agree with the way I’ve been portrayed in this book. Admittedly, those are my emails, but something is amiss evidently because they don’t…

They Don't Want You To Read This (A message from Jonathan Armory-Wargrove)

Sunday, 2 June 2019

40%! Woah! Help publish the books THEY don't want you to read! The Deep State vets ALL manuscripts submitted to regular publishers - FACT! Support the little guy and beat the Main Stream Media! POWER TO THE PEOPLE! 



P.S. Also, demand full UFO disclosure now! Expose the COSMIC Conspiracy!

Life Begins at Forty (a poem by Blue)

Sunday, 2 June 2019

Life Begins at Forty


by Blue 


They say that life begins at forty - don't make me laugh!

As the dread day approaches I feel like a giraffe

With laryngitis.

My creative juices will dry up and agglutinate

And people will say that it's age inappropriate

To have a full back tattoo of Robert Smith.

They say that life begins at forty, you'll feel free!

But that is not how it feels to me.

Hitting the big four-oh!

Sunday, 2 June 2019

We're delighted to tell you that we've hit the big four-oh - 40% funded at last.

Thanks so much to everyone who has pre-ordered a copy of Fatberg - we couldn't have got this far without you. 

Some of the characters from our fictional Crawley Writers' Group have been threatening to add their own voices to the commemoration of this important psychological milestone. We can only apologise in advance…

Kitten on a Fatberg hits 30%! Thank you so much

Friday, 5 April 2019

We are delighted to announce that funding for the launch of Kitten on a Fatberg has now hit the 30% mark! We want to say a massive thank you to everyone who has pledged or helped to spread the word -- this is all your doing, and we couldn’t be more grateful.

Many of you don’t know each other, of course, so we thought it might be interesting to introduce a few of our amazing supporters…

As chair…

We have our 100th backer!!!

Friday, 29 March 2019

Great news! Our 100th backer came aboard yesterday! We're thrilled that so many people believe in the project, and want to see the Kitten sail. Blue, our resident Sylvia Plath, has written a poem to mark the occasion, which our lucky 100th supporter will receive exclusively for this weekend, before it receives its world debut on Monday.

Who will be our 100th backer?

Thursday, 28 March 2019

99 wonderful, generous people have so far made pledges in support of our little project. Who will be the 100th??

In their honour, Blue has bared her tortured soul with a poem. It's called 'And the Number of My Pain is One Hundred'. I've read it and I can tell you, it's bleak, poignant, plaintive, elegiac, bleak. Everything you'd expect of Blue.

If you want to receive exclusive early-bird access…

We've hit 20%!

Monday, 11 March 2019

A huge thank you to all who have pledged so far in support of 'Kitten on a Fatberg'. We're absolutely thrilled to have reached 20% funding and are now more determined than ever to push on to 100%. There's been loads going on since we launched just over a month ago. We've had a write-up in the local press, and are shortly to be featured in 'Boundless' and the Society of Authors magazine. We've also…

Thank you!

Saturday, 9 February 2019

Thanks so much to everyone who has helped us get to 10% of our funding milestone in our first week! We've been blown away by how generous people have been, and we really really appreciate it.

The fatberg has been having a bit of moment this week, what with the monster they pulled out of the sewers in Sidmouth, Devon, and the launch of a public info film disguised as a movie trailer, Fatberg Invasion…

54% funded
156 backers