Keanu Reeves Is Not In Love With You

By Becky Holmes

My Encounters With Online Romance Scammers

Wednesday, 26 October 2022

Oh balls! Well and truly mid-40s

I turned 44 yesterday so I've had to stop hanging onto the 'I can probably still class myself as early-40s' thoughts.

44 is well and truly mid-40s. Damn and blast!

Perhaps due to a birthday coming up I've been doing quite a lot of reflecting over the past few weeks and I'll share with you what are probably the top five thoughts that have been rattling around my head.  

1) The course of your life can change in a heartbeat as the result of something that seemed so tiny at the time (in my case sharing one of my direct message conversations on Twitter). Life can be tough and almost unbearable but when it throws you a curveball and you see a bit of light at the end of what has been a very long tunnel, you must grab every chance.

2) It's interesting how people come and go in life. Some only stay for a very short time but their presence and influence will always be felt, and sometimes the people that hurt you the most are actually teaching you the most useful lessons, teaching you things you can take forward.

3) Being thought of as funny or witty has become so much more of a compliment to me than pretty or 'fit' (although being mid-40s those days are far behind me anyway haha). Being able to make other people laugh through Twitter has saved me from some very dark depressions and kept me going despite sometimes doing it while crying. 

4) Joining a gym, going twice a week, half-heartedly walking round looking at the machines then going to the cafe downstairs will not shed the two stone I have put on recently, no matter how much I pretend that it will just because I'm wearing Adidas leggings.

5) Writing a book is sooooooooo hard and sooooooooo stressful, especially with myriad health conditions, but I WILL finish it, it WILL be published and it WILL be ace! 

Thank you to everyone for bearing with me during what is a very long process and will not be finished for a little while yet. 

Much love x 



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Pádraig Floyd
 Pádraig Floyd says:

Keep on keeping on, Sherlock. It will be fabulous when you're on Loose Women.

posted 26th October 2022

Brian Lawley
 Brian Lawley says:

Ah, wait until you get to 50 Becky and then things start falling off.
That’s something to look forward to isn’t it!
Oh and hey…You’re doing great Girl (and you’re still pretty AND fit).

posted 26th October 2022

Pamm Whittaker
 Pamm Whittaker says:

Hey, I met the love of my life online (Me in the US, he in Australia), and we got married 3 days before my 50th birthday :) I had thought I was done with love, after 3 failed marriages and too many failed relationships. Guess life showed me!

You're amazing, Becky, and I cannot wait to read the book! :)

posted 26th October 2022

Bernard Gray
 Bernard Gray says:

Happy Birthday Becky! I’m hate to argue with you, but 44 is certainly early 40s… indeed it rounds down to 40 if you squint.

Congratulations on scaring the sex pest to death about his stomach spot… he looked like the most hideous specimen imaginable.

I feel the sadness in your post, as well as the determination. You have a platform, a purpose, a mission. Such a clear vocation is not given to all of us.

Good luck with the writing, my dear friend.

It is hard, but that’s why it’s worth it!

posted 26th October 2022

Gordon Howell
 Gordon Howell says:

There is certainly some interesting, thought provoking stuff in this post. What I take from it is we should make the most of what we have got while we can. From where I stand you seem to be doing that! I know nowt about writing a book but it sounds like the sort of challenge that will give you a real sense of achievement when it’s done. Taking on the scammers is a useful contribution to society and writing a book about it is a very worthwhile thing to do. Knowing all that could help spur you on when things get stressful!

posted 26th October 2022

Caroline Gale
 Caroline Gale says:

You're doing great! Really looking forward to reading the book when it's finished - take all the time you need. Your tweets are the sunny highlights in my evenings of doomscrolling, often reducing me to tears of laughter and an inability to speak at all when I try to share them with my husband. Keep up the great work confusing and confounding the pervs.

posted 27th October 2022

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