Horse Destroys the Universe
By Cyriak Harris
"I think our horse might be eating the internet"
Publication date: Summer 2019
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Life was simple for Buttercup the horse. Chewing grass in a field, gazing dreamily at passing clouds or standing at a hedge to watch the world go by. Perhaps a light nap followed by a gentle canter and more grazing, and then off to the stable for a programme of psychological tests designed to expand the boundaries of horse consciousness.
For Betty and Tim, life was also simple. Or at least as simple as life could be when you are scientists conducting neurological experiments on a horse. That is until the day they discovered their horse was conducting an experiment of its own.
Life became rather more complicated after that for Tim, Betty and Buttercup, and the ensuing struggle for control over one horse's destiny results in an intellectual arms race that takes all three of them to the edge of reality and beyond. It is a struggle that threatens to shake the foundations of civilisation and unravel the fabric of time and space. Can anyone stop this horse from destroying the universe?
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Cyriak Harris
My name is Cyriak, and yes that is a real name. I don’t meet many other Cyriaks in my travels, but I know they are out there, lurking in the shadows.
I started making weird animated gifs in 2004, and even weirder animated videos in 2006, and have been spreading my evil spores across the internet ever since. My commercial work spans such diverse realms as advertising, television and music videos.
I lived in Brighton for about ten years, and moved somewhere else several years ago. Everyone still thinks I live in Brighton, and I have lost the strength of will to keep correcting them. I currently live in a crumbling house in the middle of nowhere, which is kept standing by the efforts of its many resident spiders.
My website is http://cyriak.co.uk. You can follow me on twitter @cyriakharris.
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These people are helping to fund Horse Destroys the Universe.
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Donovan Rodgers
Paul Dadaux
Kurt Faasse
Steve Smart
Mario Göppel
Jules Mortensen
Bastián González
Lindsay Pethick
GMark Cole
Jake Lee
Stefanie Petrik
Matthew Robb
Samuel Struik
Allen M
Ken Blakey
Adam Vessey
Evgenii Zimichev
Oskar Wirth
Santeri Joki
Heesoo Jang
Emilia Apell
Johannes de Fine Licht
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I know it's a ton of work, but imagine how incredible an audiobook version narrated by the author would be.
Haha! Yeah it would be nice, but I found even narrating the promo video for this book was a nightmare, so I'd be glad to let somebody else have a go.
I've got the impression that the book is already written and you are just trying to publish it, is that right? Or do you have a lot of writing work to? Anyway, looking forward to reading it!
Yes the book is finished and more or less ready to go.
How many pages will the book roughly have?
Around 380 I have been told. It is about 90k words, so somewhere between The Hobbit and Nineteen Eighty-Four. If that helps.
Hello, Good Sir! I am a big fan of your animation works and music and very determined to support this project. One friend of mine has heard about this project, but he is being a little hesitant about spending his money on it as he already has planned to spend spare cash on pc upgrade(not worth it, he can do this anytime later as I know). Could you tell me a little more about this book? Is it be big or short? Does it have illustrations? I want to convince him to support this project, cuz there is an option for two-edition, so we both can save on shipping a little. And more importantly he loves your works too. p.s. I'm going to fund this project anyway, I'm very glad to know you decided to write a book, and I can't wait to read it. I'll understand if you have to keep all details on your work in secret until it's released. p.s.s. guy who's suggested to narrate audiobook with your voice has the point I don't know if you have other ideas about this, but your voice fits perfect in my opinion p.s.s.s Sorry for my amateur English :) Regards.
Thanks for your questions. It is an average size book, you could possibly read the whole thing in a day, though I would take longer myself. There are no illustrations unfortunately. Your friend is welcome to wait and see what other people say about the book before buying it, if they are unsure.
How "mature" is the intended audience for this book? Can I read it with my 10yr old who does OK with stuff like Terry Pratchett and Philip Pullman?
I guess it would very much depend on the 10 year old. As far as adult material goes it is very mild. They might find some technical parts a little hard to follow, but might enjoy it anyway. It would probably be best to read it yourself first and see if you think it is appropriate.
Will the book contain illustrations?
No. Part of me wishes that it did, but another part of me wants to let people use their imaginations.
Aprox. when will shipping start? Ps. Looking forward to reading the book. Pps. Amazing and unlike YouTube videos. Keep up the good work.
Thanks, glad you like my stuff. According to the info on this site the publishing process can take several months after funding has completed, so I can't say for sure when it would ship. I'd make sure to keep everyone updated though.
I'm looking forward to read this trippy but somehow cute book. If you are considering to do an audiobook version, please accept a little bit of help from this Italian fella. Yes, you will hear a really strong Roman accent, but it would surely enrich the trippy experience in all its entirety LOL. Just kidding, obv. Anyway, you're doing great, and I'm sure you book would be the greatest trip in my entire life.
Thanks for the offer!
Is there a plan to release gifs/videos that'll follow the story's narrative? I love your visual weirdness !
Cheers! I haven't planned to, but it would be interesting to try and animate some of the more surreal scenes in the story
Do you have any estimate on how long it'll take to ship once funded? I only ask since I am living where I am currently for a few months longer, and as someone who's been watching your stuff since at least '08, I want to make sure I get a signed copy from you!
According to the unbound website the process of making the book can take several months, so you might need to give them your new address at some point.
I am very interested in getting a copy of Horse Destroys the Universe, but not as much as a paperback. Is there any chance of creating a hardcover tier?
There aren't any plans for a hard cover version, sorry
How crazy an animation movie would be amazing about this book ?!
It would certainly be interesting to see.
Hey Cyriak! I had a couple of questions about the book. Do you know the rough dimensions of the physical copy? I was wondering since I ordered the paperback and was thinking of making a cover/protector thing for it. I didn't know if I could start planning the construction now. Also, will there be cover art? And if so, are you going to design it? Thanks!
The book will be "B format" which is 129mm by 198mm. I'm not sure how long the process of publishing will take but you probably have plenty of time yet. I will be creating some cover art for it. There is also a pledge incentive to get a print of the artwork. I haven't started working on it yet, but I have to wait til I discuss it with the publisher in case they have any specific requirements.
I know others asked about shipping times, but what about the digital versions? Any idea when the ebooks will get sent out?
I've no idea, I'd assume that both would be released simultaneously, which would mean digital versions would arrive sooner than physical copies, but I'll probably know more about that when we are further into the whole process
Have you optioned the film rights yet? Besides yourself, who would be your first choice to: * Write the screenplay? * Direct the film? * Compose the score? * Play the role of Buttercup? Really looking forward to reading the story. Best regards, Stef.
Cheers. I think I'll wait for this egg to hatch before counting any chickens.
How much will the book cost roughly ?
You can still back the first edition of the book, the prices are up on the right. £10 for digital version and £15 + shipping for paperback.
Should i read this book aloud to all my classmates during reading time? P.S. "Because" made me cry tears of joy. Cheers, Anthony.
I think you might have to judge that for yourself, but if you do I would recommend adding a few neighs at random intervals.
Glad to see the manuscript has moved on publishy-process-wise. Hope you're coping alright with it all (I'm aware that editing can be a harsh thing to endure) and if you could use the shoulder of a complete stranger for support, there's at least one here prepared to carry a burden. We all think you're an incredibly good egg and are cheering you on all the way.
Thanks!
Old school b3ta reprobate here - hoping the ebook arrives in time for my upcoming week lounging by the pool drinking as much sangria as they'll bring me.
Cheers. I've been given a rough estimate of next summer for release.
Could you also release a hardcover version with just the title and one of those paper covers that comes off? I want to be reading the book and someone will look over at the cover and it just says, “horse destroys the universe” in big bold letters. That would be hilarious, look forward to buying your book.
Thanks, unfortunately there is no plan for a hard cover version.
Might I be addressing the legend in his own time who once graced the corridors of Perins? Shall by the text regardless as it has triggered my interest!
I am indeed the same Cyriak who went to Perins, though I'd hope after 30 years I am also quite a different Cyriak as well! I remember writing some pretty crazy stories back then, its a shame I never kept any of them. I also remember having an english teacher called Mr Charde, who was one of the good ones.
Once the book is released, how can I order it?
Once it is released you will be able to order it from this website, or you can pre-order a copy by pledging. Pledge rewards are now closed, but there is still the option to pledge for just a copy of the book.