Friday, 26 October 2018
TLGWGZF arrival time. GET YOUR HASHTAGS AT THE READY.
You didn’t seriously think this was over yet? I’ve got your email address now… I’m GDPR compliant and I’m not afraid or legally prohibited to use it. (Cuts to the sound of a thousand clicks, unsubscribing.)
But to be clear - you’re a part of something. It might be something small, something that in a week, year or a hundred years may be utterly irrelevant and no one cares, but right now you’re a part of something lovely which is The Little Girl Who Gave Zero Fucks publication and that sweet little big hearted book is gonna be shooting through your letterbox any day now. The post-people have been asked to time the package insertion for that exact moment you kneel on the doormat to pick up your other post and then BAM – it’ll bop you right on the schnoz.
And rightly so.
I hope you like it!
And because I don’t have a marketing budget to tell everyone about the book if you DO like it there’s a few ways you can help other people who might like it to see it and buy it.
#zerofucks in social media.
When you get it, tweet it! Instagram it! Facebook it! (If people still do that?) Take up vlogging and vlog it! Use the hashtag #zerofucks. I’m @keano81 on Twitter and ace_keano on Instagram if you wanna tag me.
Write one? It helps sales. Don’t lie, though. I don’t want you to lie. Of course, the plan was to create something good enough that people enjoyed reading it, so just say what you think and give it the number of stars you think it deserves. The Amazon link is here https://www.amazon.co.uk/Little-Girl-Gave-Zero-Fucks/dp/1783526459 and you can also pre-order the book from WHSmith, Waterstones, Foyles and Blackwells. Spoilt for choice!
Tube and transit.
Read it proudly on the tube and make people jealous. Fellow travelers might even take photos of you reading it because the title is so SHOCKING and that’s what everyone wants on their morning commute, isn’t it? To have their photo taken by a stranger? Here's an artist's impression of what it might look like when that happens.
We all struggle with small talk at parties and the office. Now you have a copy of The Little Girl Who Gave Zero Fucks you have something to chat about in the office kitchen (water coolers don’t exist anymore, deal with it).
But not only that, there’s a party on the evening of Tuesday 30th October in London (the city) to coincide with the launch of the book. Because you bought the book and I’d like to say thank you, you’re invited. But you have to sign up quick! Here’s ten things about the launch party next Tuesday that are going to be brilliant:
- It’s at the Shoreditch Platform. An immense venue. There’ll be decorations.
- There’s gonna be a #zerofucks cocktail on arrival (free)
- There’s gonna be pizza for you to eat (free)
- I’ll say a few words, of course
- We’re gonna have an amazing talk on witchcraft
- We’re gonna cast spells!
- We’re gonna have Hallowe’eny make-up on offer!
- We’re gonna have scary and brilliant music from an actual DJ
- Oh and there’ll be a few books spare if you wanna buy one. Give me cash.
- As parties go it’s pretty well-rounded, to be honest. You’d be wise to come. There’s a few spaces left apparently, so if you wanna head along, then book a place (don’t sign up unless you’re gonna come). Just tap your deets in here https://www.eventbrite.com/e/the-little-girl-who-gave-zero-fucks-halloween-book-launch-tickets-50102008456 and I’ll see you there for the beginnings of the worst hangover I’ve ever had in my life.
Thank you, again. For making this happen. And hopefully next time we meet you’ll be thanking me for writing something you love to the extent you’d probably score it five stars out of five.
Signed, with Zero Fucks