Falling Upwards

By Theresa Davis

A chance social media discovery leads Theresa on a path to new perspectives on her past life

LGBTQ+ | Non fiction
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This is my story, of how I fought adversities, constantly falling and rebuilding to a better life.
In 2018, I found out by coincidence on social media that my sister had died. Back in contact with my remaining family I made new discoveries, traumatic memories resurfaced, and I examined my childhood in a new light.
I'd enjoyed feminine activities like ballet, but later blurted to a child psychologist that things would be better if I was a girl. In mid 80s, this was scandalous and my parents (a non-out, lesbian couple) were encouraged to "make a man" of me. This meant more discipline, social isolation and enrolment in a quasi-military cadet force to toughen me up.
Forced into the wrong box, I spent my early adulthood in denial, drowning my true nature in alcohol, before becoming involved in an abusive relationship. After my mother died my life imploded and I lost virtually everything. Crawling from the wreckage, I finally faced the reason why I'd never been able to “man up”. I'm not a man.
When I came out as transgender and started to transition my employers announced a disciplinary panel which got me outed by the press.
I found love and a new family, but we suffered physical attacks against our house and car. My partner suffered a breakdown, and I had to suppress my own emotions to support her.
A new job on the website for a major Fleet Street name allowed me to be open, happy and respected. I was there for some of the key events of the early 21st Century, such as 9/11. After a few bittersweet years I took redundancy and started a new life in Spain.
Ultimately, this is a story of triumph.
My message is “Always keep going, things do get better”.
 

ABOUT THE BOOK

  • B format [160 x 240mm] 
  • Paperback book 
  • ~ 400 pages
  • Support this project

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    The Book

    The book and your name in the back of the book

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    • Theresa Davis avatar

      Theresa Davis

      Theresa Davis has only existed since 1998 before then she spent the first 27 years of her life growing up feeling like a square peg in a round hole, trying to fit a male body.
      Denied the ability to study further and attend university, she left school at 16 and headed out to work. Through hard work and determination, she came so close to graduating with her BSc but it was not to be.
      This however didn’t stop her after coming out as trans and facing trumped up disciplinary action which lead to her public outing in the media.
      It was ironic that 2 years on from these events she would become the team leader for the operations team at The Daily Telegraph responsible for keeping the website online 24/7.
      Following redundancy from the paper in 2007 she moved to Spain where she now lives with her partner Helen and 2 cats.
      When not running her cloud computing consultancy she likes to travel with her trademark purple fedora.

    • My story begins not at the beginning but at an end.

      It was late on a Sunday evening in April I was laying on the bed in a 4-star hotel we had booked as a special treat to celebrate Helens’ birthday. Chilling after our evening meal idly flicking through social media, I decided to search for some of my family. Now for various reasons that will become clear along the way I wasn’t connected with any of my family on Facebook, but I would occasionally look up the one or two that I had been able to identify. On opening my youngest nieces page, I came across a photo of my sister, I realised that this was a picture from a few years ago when my sister and her husband had renewed their vows. Puzzled as to why she had posted this older photo I opened the comments, as I read my heart sank further with every line. Each one was an expression of sympathy for her loss in one form or another. I couldn’t believe, the implication of what I was reading. There could only be one conclusion, something had happened to my sister and she had died. I had no idea as to the cause of her death; she was only 52 and there was no mention as to what had occurred.

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    • 11th June 2020 Why?

      Some may ask why did I write the book. There are a number of answers to this, and I think the question should also be why now?

      But first the answer as to why write it in the first place, it had been something that I always considered doing at some point in my life, but having been an abismal failure in English at school. I had never even considered that I would have been able to accomplish anything…

      28th May 2020 Small Steps

      First I would like to thank all those that have pledged in this first couple of weeks. It has not been the ideal time to launch a funder in the middle of a crisis when many are furloughed or have been made redundant. So again I thank you deeply.

      Now to some important things, progress. The 1st draft of the book itself is complete at around 95,000 words. I am in the process of doing the primary major…

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