Currency $ USD
Published
Publication date: August 2015
110% funded
228 backers
Cover of Ex

An everyday story of a 32-stone policeman determined to kill his son

Daniel’s father wants to kill him. It’s something of a family tradition.

Luckily, he’s a survivor. But with his thirty-two stone psychotic police sergeant father concocting ever more obscure methods of killing him, Daniel needs to find a way to save himself. Unfortunately for him, his mother isn’t of much help – she’s abandoned the family home to live out her life as a mermaid. School offers no respite, either – the school bully, Dorsal Grellman, is an eight year old that looks like an elephant on steroids, and he’s made torturing Daniel his daily project.

But after Daniel makes friends with Ferris, a brilliant but irritating genius who manages to befriend Dorsal, the three embark on a journey to discover the source of Daniel’s father’s rage, reunite his family and find a place for themselves in the world.

Ex is black comedy like you’ve never read it before. An imaginatively absurd, fantastically vivid account of one boy’s day-to-day struggle to avoid annihilation. It takes you on a voyage down the Thames on the world’s largest and most deadly wooden potato. Along the way you’ll meet an outrageous array of characters: from a flock of swearing ducks to a cappuccino-swigging lion, a grandmother with a predilection for murdering superheroes to the world’s least successful hostage negotiator.

Ex is one of the wildest, funniest, and most violent books you’ll ever read – it makes Kill Bill look like Toy Story. If you’re squeamish, stay far away, but if you’ve ever laughed at others' misfortune, or relished a moment of gratuitous, unnecessary violence, then this is the book for you.

For Every £20 You Pledge, £5 Goes to Charity:

Despite its violence and its humour, Ex is a book which carries at its heart a message of hope for children who face and overcome incredible adversity. That’s why the author has decided to match pledges with donations to Shooting Star Chase Children's Hospice.

Shooting Star Chase - Children's Hospice Care

Shooting Star Chase is a leading children’s hospice charity, caring for babies, children and young people with life-limiting conditions. Whether lives are measured in days, weeks, months or years, staff of the hospice are there to make every moment count, support families from diagnosis to end of life and throughout bereavement with a range of nursing, practical, emotional and medical care.

Their support is free of charge to families and available 365 days a year. But it costs £9.5 million a year just to maintain their current level of care and with only 10% of that income coming from government funding they rely on their supporters’ generosity to keep the service running.

Laurie Avadis has been an artist, a photographer, an author and a musician – and he still routinely gigs with his band The Nightingale Experience. Writing, though, has been his definitive mode of expression for him from an early age. Laurie is also a family lawyer, and he’s had the unfortunate experience of working with children in situations as bad as, and even worse, than the character Daniel himself. That’s what started him writing this book. Laurie’s idiosyncratic black humour may not paint things as they really are, but it does make it a little easier – even fun – to look closer at the deeply important issue of justice for children.

Saturday had arrived, as Saturdays do, and Daniel woke to the sound of his father sharpening a meat cleaver over his bed and singing the aria “One Fine Day” from Puccini’s Madame Butterfly. Nothing out of the ordinary there, then.

Read more...

An excerpt from 'And' the follow up novel to 'Ex'

Monday, 4 April 2016

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Before Drake became a zoo keeper in the gorilla enclosure of London Zoo he had spent quite a long period of time in prison. Drake was in prison for two reasons - firstly he had helped George Skin save the world (for the first time) and secondly they had been caught. 

 

Tiberius Drake’s formative years were relatively uneventful. After making an exquisitely imperceptible impact on the world of…

The final edit of Ex goes out for approval

Thursday, 23 October 2014

Photo on 17 10 2014 at 21.27

I cannot believe it but I sent the final edit of Ex to Luke last night having written an extra chapter. There is likely to be a little bit more editing to come I expect - we still have to send it off to the wonderful people in the good ship Unbound for their approval but Luke is talking about the cover designer reading it now so this is getting real. 

Now, Slaughterhouse-Five came in at…

Here are the photographs of France

Sunday, 19 October 2014

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Photographs - giant cheque given to Shooting Star and France in October

Sunday, 19 October 2014

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So, I finally met the wonderful Kate from Shooting Star. M y dear friend Lee Playle  - a brilliant graphic artist,  wrote out the giant cheque and we trooped down the road with Catherine my wife. The local press were there - they  can't resist a giant cheque.          

We are getting close to the final edit. Luke has sent another version back to me and we are getting really close to…

Ex the movie part 2 - the story behind the short film

Tuesday, 14 October 2014

Hi all,

When I first decided to start working with Unbound I had in mind to try to provide an image of what M would look like to me and to do so in the form of a short film showing him in action. We know he is a 32 stone police officer and I was close to using a man who was over 30 stone who was also a sumo wrestler before I was introduced to Good King Hal who is an official Henry the VIII…

EX the movie part 2 - here it is

Tuesday, 14 October 2014

The wonderful Oliver 'my son' Breckon has finished his work on our promo film and the link is below. 

Thanks again to the big man himself - King Hal who plays Ex and to my nephew Sam and his wonderful lady partner Caroline. 

My role in this film is on the cutting room floor which is bloody typical.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-pAulqhJEDU&feature=youtu.be

 

 

Rosalind

Thursday, 2 October 2014

Photo on 2010 08 20 at 14.56

On the day that Rosalind died

my sisters and I

stood in straight alignment 

like 3 celestial bodies in syzygy 

 

My brother-in-law

Brian

and I

carried the void she left in our lives

on our shoulders 

to my airing cupboard 

where we hid it

in the snicket 

between the bath towels

and the torn curtains

we do not have the heart

to throw away

 

I felt…

Last 20 pledges needed - prize draw

Tuesday, 30 September 2014

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Hi all - those generous people at Unbound will enter anyone who pledges now into a free prize draw to attend the launch party.  Please help me over this final hurdle.

Laurie xxxx

 

Other trains

Friday, 26 September 2014

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Her voice was like 

the Siberian air masses 

which chill 

the eastern slopes of the Urals 

 

She worked the tables 

in the kind of bar 

which claims to be in Gdansk 

but isn't in Gdansk.

It had been fashioned from the 

hollowed out 

exoskeleton 

of a giant beetle 

with toilet facilities 

in the tip of the carapace 

 

I was on my way to Kyiv

to give…

Ex the movie part 1

Thursday, 25 September 2014

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Well, the promo film has been shot. Ollie who is a producer from Channel 4 did the filming,  Mike - the big man who is playing 'M' and my nephew and Caroline his lady-person all played their roles and there is a cameo from yours truely.

Ex - the short film, the 32 stone policemen and very very big cheques

Monday, 22 September 2014

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The wonderful Ollie (not to be confused with the wonderful Marcia) (not that you could confuse Ollie, a Channel 4 TV producer who lives in London,  with my cousin Marcia an artist who lives in New York but since they both have 'wonderful' in their names I did not want to take a risk) and I have been planning to make a short promo film for Ex for some months now. There were a number of issues. Firstly…

Of rain and of shadow

Wednesday, 17 September 2014

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She wore red sequinned shoes

and every now and again she

espied them

and part of her right eye

grinned

When she sat down beside me

in the train carriage

she was like an occupying army

laying siege to the armrest

erecting pontoon bridges

across my leg space

My fingers were forced to abandon my laptop to an uncertain fate

and retreat

until I gave the impression

of a man in prayer

Her 64th boyfriend

Sunday, 14 September 2014

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Congratulations Marcia Miller for making the pledge that got me down to 99 pledges required - you now have a character named after you in "Ex". All I am going to say is, I hope you don't like ant eaters. Marcia has become pledge obsessed and lets me know whenever we gain another percentage point. Quite simply, her support has kept me going whenever I have flagged. She is currently in Cape Cod with…

We are at 101 pledges needed. I will name a character in the book after the person who gets this down to 99 pledges

Saturday, 13 September 2014

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I am still adding material to the book and am currently writing a new chapter. I will name a character in the book after the person who gets me down to 99 pledges -  I an either use their name or a name of their choice (their child, dog, llama - there are llamas everywhere you know - open your eyes - I saw one today in Hounslow town centre sitting on a park bench playing a viola) (although to be fair…

Fantastic news from Shooting Star Children's Hospice and my interview with ABCtales

Wednesday, 10 September 2014

We have managed to raise over £600 for the hospice in five weeks! The money raised so far could pay for a sensory day for children with very complex needs. Both the family and the child can experience a range of themed sensory activities. Those of you who have pledged have paid for this and Shooting Star have asked me to thank you all for your incredbile generosity and kindness.

For those of you…

Humbled by darkness

Tuesday, 9 September 2014

I returned home on Christmas Eve

to find the house

which had been punctuated by a thousand

astral semicolons

when I left

was humbled

by darkness

I reached for the light switch

but there was only your hand

and your embrace

It was the gateway to a garden

where every living thing

has perished

from insouciance

“When we were first together”

you told me

your eyes as dangerous as feral…

Her eyes belonged to infinity

Friday, 5 September 2014

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"Don't fuck with me or I will hurt you."

Her voice was grey green

like the bruises

the rain leaves on a forest floor

She pressed the tip

of her home made shank

against

my trachea

just beside my oesophagus

until butterfly kisses of blood

tattooed my collar

I could grasp

only a snapshot of her face

through the corner of my right eye

it was cratered and indistinct

as if it were a facet…

A poem about my father and some favourite photographs taken in the USA and the UK

Tuesday, 2 September 2014

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The day before

the day before

you died

I was the charismatic but ruthless leader

of a hundred thousand

mogul warriors

as they battled

a rag-tag mercenary army

of astronauts, medieval knights and GI's

for supremacy over our

settee and coffee table

You were not witness

to this senseless internecine carnage

because you were at the office

where

it latterly transpired

you lived

You…

Some images from Glasgow and Whistable - August 2014

Friday, 29 August 2014

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A little bit of my stuff

Monday, 25 August 2014

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Hi all,

I thought I would share a bit of my work  - I write music, take photographs and write poetry and I wanted to share some of this with you.

I have attached a sound file of "World of Fantasy" a song written by myself and the very wonderful Mark Donegan, sung by Thea. 

This is a photograph taken in Porto earlier this year which I was pleased with. 

This is a poem written in 2011…

Atom by Atom

Saturday, 16 August 2014

She has the kind of

immutable

throat burstingly cruel

beauty

that makes men's eyes bleed

and women strafe their faces

with their

claws

You need a shot

of pure hypoxic helium nitrate

just to speak to her

and when her eyes

fall upon yours

it is as if you are being

disseminated

atom by atom

like the febrile

mist

rising from a

battlefield

She does not have a name

it is not necessary…

25% a quarter of the way there

Friday, 15 August 2014

Well we are getting there - day 9 and I can see what my life is going to be like - at court today I approached a solicitor and a Barrister and got them to pledge as I was standing over them. I only have to do that another 243 times!!!!!  

 

 

My cousin Marcia is just - I am sorry I am lost for words

Thursday, 14 August 2014

She has contacted no less than 37 friends and encouraged them to pledge. She has a heart the size of a mountain and she is really my unnoficial third sister. Marsha is in New York but when my mother passed away in April she was by our sides in under 24 hours. This process is really showing me how special some of the people I know are.

A week is a long time in this town

Thursday, 14 August 2014

Well week one has come and gone. The generosity and support from places and people I had never expected has been incredible. I will go in to my local Shooting Star Hospice shop to say hello this weekend and arrange to visit the Hospice itself. 

My cousins have been amazing - Marsha from the USA, Louise and Louis - he has started a campaign on Facebook. This process really does encourage special…

V V
V V asked:

Greetings. I ontained the ebook and put it on my ioad however the ebook was deleted after on OS system upgrade and now i cannot find it anywhere on my ipad. Please can you send me a link so that I can please download the ebook again? Is there a way that the ebook will not disappear after ipad OS uogrades because I did not buy the book from ibooks?

Yours sincerely,
Vyvy

Unbound
Unbound replied:

Hi Vyvy,

Thanks for getting in touch. If you log in to your Unbound account you can download the ebook from https://unbound.co.uk/books/ex/ebooks.

Best wishes,

Unbound Support

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